When I picked up my daughter from her sitter yesterday I got "the vibe". You know, that feeling you get that you aren't doing as much as you could/should for your child? Whether "the vibe" actually comes from other people or from some place deep inside of yourself, as I suspect, it isn't a good feeling. I suddenly wondered, for the first time, if I ask enough questions about my daughter's day when I pick her up. I realized with a jolt, that as long as my daughter is alive, happy, and without injury I really don't care how the day went. Is that awful? Is that normal? Or am I a horrible parent, totally callous and disconnected from my child?
After the cold sweat went away I started to think about this. When I am not with my daughter, I don't spend my time away thinking about what she is doing. While some might see this as cold and disinterested, I would like to consider it balanced and healthy. I did a lot of work finding the right childcare situation for my daughter with someone that I completely trust. That time and work and research at the beginning pays off now, since I can leave my daughter with her caregiver without worry.
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